I've had this continuing blog for years and have only lost a few pounds which I managed to put back on (plus some). But this time, I really mean it. I have to loose weight. Why you might ask is this time different? Is it the holiday pictures of me looking like such the Fat Bastard? Or is it the constant "I feel fat" syndrome? Is it that I can't fit anything in my closet or that I am still wondering who that is staring back at me in the mirror? Surprisingly no.
I'm beginning to think that my dear sweet hubby is bothered by my extra baggage. He hasn't said anything or even insinuated it but a wife knows. I can hear every last one of you saying, "No way!! Duane is not like that." As I said before, it's nothing he said it's just my feeling. The evidence:
Exhibit 1: He never comes right up to bed when he comes home from work. I find him sleeping in front of the television with a bowl of cereal in his hands.
Exhibit 2: He's not romantic anymore.
Exhibit 3: I rearranged my work schedule so I could be off yesterday and he volunteered to work at his 2nd job.
Exhibit 4: We don't cuddle or do anything fun anymore.
I do make time for him through all the madness with work, school and everything else. But I feel like he's just not interested any more. Why? I've done everything. I've changed my hair, made sure I have time for him in my schedule and everything else. The only thing left is my size.
Even though it hurts, perhaps this is the motivation I need to loose this weight. I'll keep you posted.
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